1. The subway and taxis (I never rode the bus). I just miss people watching on the train. Living in Bongwater let me see all the hot messes get woken up to stumble out because it was the last station.
2. My friendsssssssssssssssssssss. Damn. I miss those crazy motherfuckers.
3. The food! All the food. I swear to god, even the Outback tastes better in Korea.
4. The men. No one is doing it for me in America like they did in Korea.
5. Everyone (not everyone. But lots of people!) dressing nicely. I felt like such a slob over there but at least everyone else was nice to look at.
6. Drinking everywhere at any given time. 7-Eleven isn’t nearly as cool in America.
7. Shoppinggggggg. Even though I can find clothes that fit more easily here, I still prefer shopping in Korea. It was like thinspo. And cheap. Poor quality but affordable.
8. Ondol. :(
9. My bathroom. I don’t care what anyway says, I fucking love the “wet” bathrooms. LOVE THEM.
10. Sex God.
11. All the sites and scenery. Everyone talks about how pretty San Diego  is. Fuck that. Everything just looks brown and there are palm trees. It’s just not doing it for me. In Seoul, there were mountains! Namsan tower! Bongwater park! Temples! Cool buildings! Etcetera!
12. All the places to hang out. Including malls, tons of parks, millions of bars, and billions of cafes and restaurants.
13. Couple style.
14. Selcas.
15. Being able to look in the mirror 24/7 and not be judged.
16. Those damn coffee sticks. I really miss those for some reason.
     I might need to head to the H-Mart or Zion later to purchase some of those.
17. Hearing K-pop ALL THE TIME. K-pop makes me happy.
18. Bongwater. I know everyone likes to shit on Banghwa but that place holds a special place in my heart. Bongwater 4 Life.
19. Hongdae, Jongno, Itaewon, Sinchon, Kondae, and even fucking Nowon. My favorite party places in the entire world.
20. Face Shop, Nature Republic, Skinfood, Etude House…..*sigh*.
21. My nail shop. It was expensive but is the best damn mani-pedi everrrrr.
22. The convenience of atms. I could do anything with those bitches.
23. My gym! So close. So convenient. So awesome.
24. Love motels. Now, THOSE are convenient.
25. All the Ho Bars.
26. Art box, Kosney, and any other stationary store. So much cuteness.
27. Having everything I needed within 1 block of my house. Seriously. Everything was there. Two 7-Elevens, restaurants, cafes, atms, gym, grocery store, subway, bus stop, seamstress, nail shops, cell phone store, community building (for trash stickers), doctors, and stationary shop. I miss that convenience. 
28. My students. They were so lovely.
29. The view from my school.
30. Walking. I never have the chance to walk now and in Korea it’s part of your everyday life.
31. Hairbands. America does not have a single hairband worth a damn.
32. Triangle kimbap. The tuna mayonaise was my absolute favorite. I ate those way too often but don’t care. I’m craving one right now.
33. The coffee drinks. Sooooo many! And cheap. I only ever see Starbucks coffee drinks in convenience store and they cost an arm and a leg.
34. Cheese popcorn at the movies. Yessssssss.
35. Acupuncture. Cheap and effective.
36. The Han river. It’s always so enjoyable.
37. Jjimjilbangs. I pay $20 for a day pass at Aqua Day Spa for the tiniest sauna and jjimjilbang I’ve ever seen. It’s sad.

Ok, done for now.

Now, all y’all have probably seen My Thoughts On Korean Kocks and I still stand by all of it.

I wholeheartedly believe that Korean guys have a wide range of peen sizes just like any other country. However, I was still side-eyeing the articles claiming that Koreans have the smallest dicks in all the land. That just didn’t feel true to me.

Someone left a comment on my post with a link to the Korean Penis Facts Blog. This cat, I don’t know who he is, but maybe the Vincent K character that posted the blog has found the “truth” about Korean Kock size. Whatever that means.

Basically, his take on this “unfortunate misunderstanding” (indeed, Sir!) is that every other country on the average penis length survey used erectile lengths. However, Korean Penis Facts Man did a little research and uncovered that the study everyone references used the flaccid stretched penis length for Korean men.

And as this clearly scientific Wikipedia article declares, “Flaccid penis length is a poor estimate of erect length.”

So, there you have it. I would love to hear anymore thoughts or information on this obviously important topic.

I changed my profile heading thingy.

PS- I had some revelations recently.

In Korea, especially during the last year, I was about to slap a bitch at least once a day. Seriously, every single day something would happen that would make me want to explode with rage or at least irritated the hell out of me. However, there were lots of other things that would happen daily that would make me incredibly happy so it helped balance things out.

In San Diego, I have not had a single negative experience. NOTHING. Oh wait. There was that one South African guy at the car dealership that made me scowl and that’s it. BUT. There is also nothing that has happened that made me think that at any future point will I ever tell someone “this really interesting/cool/good thing happened in San Diego” or “I saw this amazingly sweet site in San Diego.” When I tell people this they look at me as if I’m insane. “San Diego is AMAZING and there is SO MUCH TO DO AND SEE.” ………….No.

To me, there is nothing that stands out about SD. There is nothing special here. That’s not a bad thing but it doesn’t make me love it here like I loved Seoul. But Seoul often pissed me the hell off sometimes so I guess SD is ultimately the winner.

UGH. Alright, San Diego Bitches. I know you read my damn blog. Give me some places to go to and I promise to go there. I’ll even blog about it. Make me change my mind about this city!! Please?

insatiable-wanderlustt:

partyintherok:

insatiable-wanderlustt:

kittykittykorea:

partyintherok:

Hey people who live in Korea, hope you like this song because you are going to hear it constantly for the next year or so!

From Youtube: “The song is characterized by its strongly addictive beats and lyrics, and is thus certain to penetrate the foundations of modern philosophy.”

Truth. I like Psy’s dances because I can actually do them. Let’s go to Table, request this, and then do our perfectly choreographed dance moves with all of the “straight” guys. 

I love Psy so much! I went totally nuts when I saw him in concert for the first time last year at a YG concert. This video is now my jam ya’ll! 

Haha, when I was watching this one of the first things I thought was “Now this is a Kpop dance I could actually do….” Kind of resembles how I normally dance to begin with.

When I saw Psy in concert for the first time I was really amazed at how much of a reaction he got from the crowd. Like, at the YG Family Concert, the middle school girls were screaming louder for him than for Big Bang. He’s a heck of a live performer and I like how his sense of humor is visible in everything he does from his dances to his lyrics to his clothes. This video was hilarious. I like the part where he is rapping and then the camera pans away a bit and you see he is sitting on a toilet.

Girl, whilst watching this I was thinking that his dances resembled how a lot of my friends dance whilst out anyways…LMFAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! I love it!

PS- Loving the appearance that my main bitch, Hyuna, makes! But seriously…we need to get these moves down tight! kkkk

“pee for me”: Um, sorry. I’ll pass.

“korean party sex tumblr”: OMG. Invite me to the sex party. I know there are people who do this in Korea but I don’t know anyone personally. Bummer.

“do korean men have body odor”: Not usually. Fugly smelled like weird meat but that was the first time I’ve ever smelled a Korean dude who smelled not nice.

“how long does it take to smell septum funk”: Not long. I remember it started pretty early. Now, I usually just smell it whenever I move the ring around. You kind of get used to the smell after a while.

“kpop guys uncut dick”: lol, Who would this be referring to? I would love to know who is cut and who isn’t. Makes it easier to imagine.

And for all of the various versions of “Korean penis size”: Please check out My Thoughts on Korean Kocks.

For all of the sex in Korea: Just browse my archives. There are plenty of stories.I’ve talked about 7/11, Trip-X, Hot Baby, The Jap, Spitter, and ummmmm…probably a few others. I looked at my Sex in Korea List and there are SO many that are left to talk about. I’ll never be able to blog about them all.

For threesomes: How I Came to Love Pussy Part 4, 2 Kboys & Kitty, and The Tale of the Terrible Threesome. There is one more but I haven’t blogged about that one yet. It’s full of lolz though. I should really get on top of that.

My new septum piercing is amaaaaaaaazing. He brought it all the way to the front this time around which is totally money. It looks great and more importantly…it is *completely* hidden when I flip it up!! I didn’t think that would be possible but I am so so so glad it worked out that way. It wasn’t nearly as painful as the first time around and doesn’t feel sore at all. $$$$ I’m freaking pumped to show my new piercings off in Korea. I think most people will hate it and think of me as a cow but 1) I don’t give a fuck and 2) I’ll be wearing it flipped up most of the time. Everyone loves the nape piercing though. I’m so happy.

Ugh. I was super mega ultra busy last week so I didn’t get to post about anything fun.

But! Y’all are a bunch of pervs and sent me some *very* interesting questions. :P hehe I think you’ll enjoy this post and I’ll try to answer your questions as best I can.

Enjoy the goodness after the jump.

Warning: This is about sex. And Pussy. Meow meow. 

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opened today. THIS IS MAJOR.

If you’re not familiar with Gimpo…it’s pretty ghetto. If you walk out of the subway station, it’s really quiet. Once you walk 5-10 minutes to the important places (E-Mart, CGV, etc…) then it starts to pick up and there’s usually quite a few people there. Especially on the weekends. It gets a little cray cray but not out of control.

But then the Lotte Mall opened. Say whaaaaaaaaaaaaat.

If you don’t know, Gangseo-gu has…well. Not much of anything. There’s the Airport, the Han river, a few things around Balsan and Gayang, lots of trees, and that’s about it. 

But now! It has the Lotte Mall. 

It is “the nation’s largest mall park facility, providing the ‘One Stop Lifestyle’ space with shopping mall, supermarket, cinema, hotel, food, cultural space, and various types of theme parks for leisure purposes.”

At least it sounds ballin’ according to the Floor Guide Book I found near information. 

Let’s see what we have…

Lotte Mart. This place was crowded as all get out so I will have to check that out another time. I hope it has things that Emart doesn’t have but I don’t have much faith in that. 

Pretty much every beauty store you would want. The Body Shop, Olive Young, Missha, TonyMoly, Nature Republic, Etude House. BUT. I did NOT see Skin Food. :( Maybe I just missed it though. 

Lots of clothing stores but the only ones I cared about were H&M, Uniqlo, Spicy Color, ABC Mart, Zara, although there is a bunch of other crap. 

Food places to note: Kraze Burger, Smoothie King, TGI.Fridays, Auntie Anne’s, Natur, Angel-in-Us (1&2), Jamba Juice, Lotteria (barf), Lynn’s Cupcakes, and Mad For Garlic. There is a loooooooooooot of other food stuff but they’re Korean, not ringing any bells for me, or it was in the food court which does not have any restaurants listed. Who knows what might be hiding in there. 

There is a Youngpoong Bookstore. That’s cool because eff’ing D-Cube City doesn’t have a single bookstore. Not impressed with that so I’m glad Lotte Mall stepped their game up. 

Upstairs (above the Lotte Mart), you will find the Digital Park. I didn’t go in here but I did see the big ass Toys ‘R’ Us. On the map, it looks like they have Apple, Samsung, Camera&Accessories, Computers&Accessories, Appliances, Lots of toys, you name it. 

The Lotte Department store has all of the name brand expensive crap that I don’t really care about. It looks like there are 5 floors of expensive goodness. 

Also, don’t forget about the new Lotte Cinema!! That’s awesome. The CGV at Gimpo is a little weenie. 

Oh, yeah, and there is some nature shit outside…or something. It was cold and I didn’t feel like going out. 

But seriously, there is so much more stuff there than what I mentioned. It’s really awesome especially for the part of town that it is in. 

This is my expertise. I swear to god, I may as well have my doctorate in fucking Korean dudes.

Warning: This is about banging dudes. If you want to actually date a guy, you should probs skip this post. All guys are different and will go for different things and yadda fucking yadda. You know my spiel. This should not be taken seriously but I sincerely believe that doing these things has gotten me laid a number of times.

PS- please excuse the truly horrendous writing in this post. It probably makes no fucking sense. Just tell me if something is really eff’ed up and you need some clarification about what the hell I’m talking about.

PPS- sorry for the length but I wanted to give you very detailed information.

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The airport railroad finally opened at Gongdeok. 아싸. This is major.

Warning: SEXPLICIT content. Seriously. I’m not fucking around about this. If you don’t like reading about sex, threesomes, or pussy, then you should skip this one. 

I get this text from the Jap at 6:30pm.

“i’d like to do threesome”

Well, yeah, me too. But I don’t know anyone who is really into that or else I would be doing it all the time. 

“i have korean friend. she wanna try it.” 

HOLY SHIT. YES. 

“when? where?” 

I responded that my place is fine and that anytime was ok. I was expecting him to throw out sometime a few days later or something but instead he says….

“she will come at 10:30 u ok?”

Ummm….TONIGHT?

“yes” 

And that’s how it began. 

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He just left. 

Even though he sees me almost daily (fuck do I really go to 7-eleven that much?), he was utterly shocked by my clothed body. Wtf. I see you all the time, dude. Anyway, I’ve lost some weight and I guess he finally noticed. 

But nothing happened…at first. We just played uno, I drank alcohol, he didn’t, and we chit-chatted. 

1) He was NOT wearing his ring like he usually does when he is working. I didn’t see him today but he was wearing it yesterday,

2) I think he had a couple cell phone charm on his phone. 

But y’all know I don’t give a fuck about a “girlfriend”. So, we kissed a bit. I could have made shit happen if I had wanted to but I have to work tomorrow so I didn’t make any moves. I can definitely fuck him next time though. For sure. 

Although… sometimes the dudes with girlfriends get guilty while they’re fucking you. It secretly pisses me off. Like, shit man, if you’re going to be a terrible boyfriend and cheat on your poor girl, you can at least man up and fuck me properly. Damn. Don’t half ass it! Go big or GO HOME. 

PS- I’ve clearly been drinking because I’m cussing like a motherfucker up in this bitch. 

I have seen a lot of penis in Korea. 

So, let me give you the truth. Are you ready for some realtalkmotherfuckingtruelifeshit?? (And some t-errible writing skillz? And the word penis X500?)

Then, let’s get it!

Warning: This post contains sexual content and is meant for you hos that are ages 18+. 

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How does it work?

I think it’s only available for iPhone/iPad/iPod shit but it’s really easy to use. Maybe too easy. I think it is waaaaay better than Skout or 1km and it much easier to use.

Step 1. Download the app. 

Step 2. Create a profile and name. You can add up to 4 pictures.  You can fill out the About Me which includes: gender, age, relationship status, interests, and spoken languages. Then you can fill out Who I’m Looking For which has: gender, age (between * &  *), Here for…, and in detail. 

Step 3. Add any filters that you want that controls who you see and who sees you. This includes online now, with or without photo, max distance away, match spoken languages, etc…

Step 4. Start cruising! If you check on the WhosHere tab, you will see who is located around you based on distance. There are usually several people online located within just a mile of you. You can look at their pictures and see what they’re looking for and what they’re interested in. 

Step 5. You’ll probably get messages right away. There is a Chat tab with a number that will tell you if you have any new messages and then you can start chatting away, ignore them, or block their asses. I will say that I think less people are using it less than before but there are still plenty of people on it. 

Step 6. If you want to continue chatting with someone then they will probably ask for your phone number or kakaotalk id because it is much easier chatting via kakao than WH. I suggest just giving them your kakao ID and not your actual phone number. It’s harder to track someone down on WH when they’re not online so I suggest exchanging some kind of other messenger IDs if you want to stay in some sort of contact with them. 

I’ve definitely mentioned WH in other posts. Maybe I should do a better job of tagging my posts. Hmmmm. Sorry about that!

WH will give you the chance to meet loooooaaaaads of dudes. But most of them just want to bang. Some of them are really rude. A lot of creeps. A few nice guys.

Just be careful and have fun!^^

Want to see the first Korean peen I banged from WH?????

I haven’t really talked to this guy since we met up in January. That was a WILD month. Let’s just say I had the “perfect week” (HIMYM reference) + 1. So much ridiculous shit happened that month. 

Anyway, it all started with this guy. Oh wait. He wasn’t the first guy I met from WH, but he was the first guy who got to stick it in.

This was way back when I felt like I needed to feel some sort of connection (or at least have a damn conversation) with a guy in order to sleep with him. Clearly, that was many dicks ago.  We met near my house and had dinner with some drinks. I needed alcohol during those days too before I could sleep with some random. After dinner, he came up to my place. We banged. He left. 

Not very memorable. But! This was a guy whose pictures looked awesome. And then I met him and it was obvious those pictures had been taken a long time ago. And he managed somehow to hide his t-errible jacked up teeth in his photos. Bless his heart. 

He texted me some weeks ago out of the blue but I didn’t respond too much then. I was bored last night though so I hopped back on the old WH and he messaged me again so I talked to him for a bit. 

I managed to get him to send me a picture of his peen. I have A LOT of dick pics from random dudes but this is definitely the most….artistic(?) of the bunch. Enjoy. 

Warning: NSFW.  You will see a real honest to goodness penis behind the cut. 

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