I am so behind in telling my sex adventures.

Bicycle. Remember him? I barely do.

He was blowing up my phone after we met the first time. Constantly. After 1-2 weeks I was finally free so I allowed him to come over.

For the record: He wanted to come over to fuck. That was the plan. OK?

OK.

It was early in the evening. He was stone cold sober.

OK? OK.

Then why the fuck couldn’t he get hard???????????????????? And why did he keep saying he was shy boy? And why did he say he was so nervous????? And why was it because I was his first foreigner???????????

Stop it. That shit is totally annoying. He had been begging me for almost 2 weeks to come over for sexy fun times. He can’t blow my kakao up for that long and then come over to act a fool.

We messed around but never had sex. He annoyed me so much that I eventually told him that I was just gonna use my vibrator. I did let him get involved by telling him to kiss my nipples. And do you know what he did? He “pop kissed” my nipple over and over. I told him to lick my nipples. He licked them like a lollipop. -_-  I was so unimpressed that after I finished, I told him that I was tired and he should go home.

We haven’t spoken much since.

Fucking weirdo.